Feel like you don’t know what’s next? It’s ok, the universe will tell you.
Last month I visited Slovakia. I saw the capital, Bratislava, and also travelled to Dechtice, a tiny village which I had never heard of before and would never have known in my whole life, if it wasn’t for my good friend Denisa who just got married there. If it wasn’t for us meeting and becoming friends four years ago, and keeping in touch with the distance, I would probably never have been to Slovakia.
There are different ways of seeing this: some will say it is fate, others will say it is just an opportunity that arose because that is what happens in life. But I can’t help being fascinated by the idea that the things I do now, younger me had no idea that they would happen. I am not one of those people who have a long-term plan, who know where they want to end up and know how to get there – which is strange, considering how I love planning and organising! It is just a wonderful thought that no matter where you are now, the universe will take you places you would never have imagined, and experience things you would never envision.
This post, I guess, is for all the worried souls who sometimes feel alittle overwhelmed by life and where it is taking them. I also feel like that, more often that I’d care to admit, but taking a step back reminds me that life has its own of way of guiding you through. So here are my reasons why it’s alright to let go and embrace the unknown:
EVERY LITTLE THING IS SHAPING YOUR TOMORROW
In the grand scheme of things, your future is not really defined by the ‘big choices’ you make. When you turn 18, it feels like the path you take will define the rest of your life. We put a lot of pressure on finding the right studies or the right job, when we aren’t yet the adults we are preparing to become. You may well start studying at 18 thinking you’ve got all your career thought through, but realise at 25 that actually, you really want to do something else. You may settle somewhere and think you would never want to move, but somehow realise over the years that the only reason to stay is because it’s comfortable.
These big decisions we take, or plan years ahead of time (when am I gonna get a permanent job? when am I gonna buy a house? when am I gonna get married? do I want to have children by the time I’m 30?) traditionally shape your life, but I feel like it is actually the smallest things that change the direction of your life. To me, these little things are mostly the people you meet (never did I think I would be in a committed relationship with someone who lives on the other side of the world!) but also the hobbies you take up, your solo projects, and your relationship with yourself. You may decide to go out one day on a whim, and meet your future partner. You may start a friendship online, and find your best friend with whom you will travel the world. You may decide to get a gym membership and years in, realise that exercising has become a defining part in your life.
It’s all about the things that you wouldn’t even notice at first, but looking back, they made you who you are. So don’t fret about the big plans, and don’t panic if you don’t have one: it doesn’t mean that your life is empty. Things will happen, no matter what.
SOMETIMES THINGS JUST FIND YOU WHEN YOU ARE NOT LOOKING
It’s easy to stress about reaching milestones in life. We all fall in the trap of comparison, and soon you realise that some people seem to have it so easy, all figured out. You can run around trying to tick all the boxes, to follow the expectations of society, or of your family, but you will most likely be stressed and unhappy, always chasing for the next big thing. Instead, why don’t you let things go? The puzzle pieces always fall into place eventually. If you widen your horizons, you are more likely to be happy with who you are and what you do, as long as you do it with purpose. Don’t get me wrong, it is ok to know what you want and fight for it, but sometimes, it may just be that the time hasn’t come. I am not a spiritual person at all, but I do like the idea of fate. Things happen for a reason, and they also don’t happen for a reason. I feel like this is especially true with relationships – friendships, love, any relationship you may have. Around me, I see so many people craving to be in a relationship, but somehow it never works out. In those cases, I feel like it’s just not meant to be. If you look, and look, and look, but don’t find anyone with whom it clicks, then stop for a minute and focus on giving yourself the love you so crave in someone else. And in time, and probably by chance, you will find that person who completes the puzzle. But instead of spending your ‘waiting’ time miserable and stressed, you will have spent it looking after yourself and finding the other things that make you happy. Sometimes, fate is all about timing and accident. Spend your life enjoy each step, not resenting them when you feel like you’re not reaching your end point.
DON’T STARE AT THE CLOSED DOORS: LOOK FOR THOSE THAT OPEN
There are so many situations in life that end up not working out. Or maybe you find yourself at a crossroads, not sure of which direction to take. This has happened to me more times than I can remember. And though you may feel lost, as everything in life, it is temporary – there will be an opportunity, a door that opens, and months in, you will look back and realise it was only a passing moment of uncertainty. You may end up in a situation different than what you’d planned, but if you make the most of it, you will grow and learn. And that’s the most important thing. Things will work out somehow, they always do.
Do you believe in fate? Tell me about one thing life brought you when you didn’t expect it!
Lots of love,
Julia x
